JaBen is Nuts

Article from WSJ 17 September 2007.... additional proof JaBen is nuts...

PAGE ONE

In Sacramento, CA,
Law Student/Roof Tile Entity Consults
Three Wee Friends
Mr. JaBen Loses Its Credibility
But Becomes a Celebrity;
Using a Little Elfin Magic

September 17, 2007; Page A1

SACRAMENTO, California -- As a law school student and roof tile salesperson, Mr. JaBen acknowledged that he regularly sought the counsel of three elves only he (it) could see. He (it) lost all credibility it might have had in the normal, regular world.

Case closed? Not here in California, where vampires are said to prey on unwary travelers and wealthy politicians consult fortune tellers and card readers. Mr. JaBen , between 28 and 35 years old, has become a media celebrity. He is now wielding his new clout to campaign for his triumphal entry back to society-- and exact vengeance on the Supreme Court.

Helping him, he says, are his three invisible companions. "Larry" is the neutral force, he says. "Curly" is a benign influence. "Moe," whom Mr. JaBen describes as the "king of kings," is an avenger.

Mr. JaBen has become a regular on Sacramento television. Often he is asked to make predictions with the help of his invisible friends. "They say Mr. BKS ( an upstanding member of the local community) will suffer terrible consequences if you don't feature me more often," was Mr. JaBen’s reply to one interviewer.

The day after Mr. JaBen’s first appearance on television last year, hundreds of people turned up at his house in a dusty Fair Oaks suburb hoping he could use his supernatural powers to heal their illnesses. Now Mr. JaBen who travels by bicycle, is regularly recognized on the street.

The California Supreme Court says its medical clinic determined that Mr. JaBen was suffering from psychosis. Even so, a series of disturbing incidents appear to have the state’s top jurists rattled. According to local newspaper reports, a mysterious fire in January destroyed the Supreme Court's crest in its session hall, and a number of members of the court and their close family members have developed serious illnesses or have fallen victim to car accidents.

Enough bizarre things have happened that in July, the Supreme Court issued an en banc resolution asking Mr. JaBen to desist in his threats of "ungodly reprisal." The Supreme Court's spokesman declined to elaborate.

Mr. JaBen says he is not suffering from psychosis, and that he's not to blame for the incidents. He points the finger squarely at "king of kings" elf Moe, who Mr. JaBen says is bent on cleaning up what he says is Mr. BKS’ pattern of deceit on his highly acclaimed and world-renowned blog site.

Mr. JaBen says he never consults the invisible elves over life’s important decisions and the fact that he puts faith in them should make no difference to his career or life. "It shouldn't matter what I believe in, whether it's Jesus, Muhammad, or Larry, Curly, and Moe," he says in an interview.

It doesn’t help matters that California has a long history of mixing organized religion with a deep belief in the supernatural. During the 1960’s and 1970s, when the northern California area was awash in elf sitings, the Central Intelligence Agency stoked fears of vampires and ghouls to help its preferred candidates win elections in the Golden State.

The elf, or "duwende," is one of a rich pantheon of supernatural beings that predate California’s colonization by Spanish conquistadors in the 16th century. Many JaBen Alliance members make regular pilgrimages to the Haight-Ashbury district in San Francisco, conduct group parties over meaningless television shows, and often times put themselves in self-induced states of stupor. Out of these group activities comes most of the elf sitings.

Jaime Licauco, who teaches parapsychology at the McGeorge School of Law, testified on behalf of Mr. JaBen in a 2007 hearing. He argued Mr. JaBen is mentally fit and argues the former decent community member’s beliefs aren't so unusual in the northern California context.

Mr. JaBen says he first realized he had the power to perceive Larry, Curly, and Moe in 2007. In early 2007, he applied to switch from being a regular “Jarrod” and “Ben” friendly pair to becoming a “JaBen”, combining two entities into one. He (it) passed a mandatory psychiatric evaluation applied to all such cases and was given rights as separate legal entity. Outward appearance of this creature was not considered. In hindsight, maybe outward appearances should count.

In 2007, Mr. JaBen invited officials from the local government’s administration to inspect his living quarters. What they found unnerved them, and the officials convened a hearing to determine whether Mr. JaBen should have his special rights of a combined organism revoked.

According to government papers, the court investigators presenting evidence at the hearing said they found Mr. JaBen experimenting with methods to harness the combining of two sets of inferior gray matters into an even more twisted composite. Mr. JaBen’s own witnesses testified that he engaged in these activities to "recharge his psychic powers."

During the hearing, Mr. JaBen revealed his contact with his elves. He also shared with the judges that Curly predicted that the sun would indeed rise the next morning. Lo, and behold, the sun did rise, emboldening Mr. JaBen in his strange efforts.

In August of 2007 after lengthy delays, the Supreme Court finally agreed to allow the continuation of the JaBen entity. Even though Mr. JaBen says the elves play no part in his day-to-day decisions, the Supreme Court justices said his broad faith in mysticism and supernatural phenomena should be monitored carefully. "Lest we be misconstrued, we do not denigrate such a belief system," an Associate Justice wrote in the Supreme Court's verdict. "However, such beliefs, especially since Mr. JaBen may act on them, are at odds with the critical and impartial thinking required of a combined law school student/ roof tile salesperson."

Mr. JaBen dissents. He has filed three appeals of the Supreme Court's decision seeking the deletion of the, in his (its) view, defamatory language in the Court’s ruling. Mr. JaBen continues his campaign on local television and on the Internet. The Supreme Court hasn't reversed any of its language, and has no plans to do so.